Kaimhill, Aberdeenshire AFA Division One (North), 31/3/23
Me 268, Wee Man 140
Great Western United Football Club
Founded – 1969
Nickname – Western
Honours – North Of Scotland Cup – 1990/91 and 2001/02. Association Trophy -1991/92. Trophies International Cup – 1993/94. Edmond Trophy – 1996/97. Premier Trophy – 2006/07. Stephen Shield – 1996/97 and 1997/98. Norman McAvoy Memorial Trophy – 1998/99. Neil Scott Memorial Trophy – 1990
Random Fact – Eh, I dinna have much for this. But I was once subbed off before I was sent off after 25 minutes for Ellon Thistle against the club after trying to obliterate their winger twice as he was tearing our full back a new arsehole. I wanted to stop it by any means necessary.
In a week that saw me on the receiving end of serious football snobbery off the back of choosing to head to Fyvie and Hermes instead of watching Scotland v Cyprus and Spain. A week where I have been informed the places I go and teams I watch are shite as people who don’t usually give a shite about football have jumped on the hype train after Scotland’s heroics over the last week and decided to be twats to people who don’t care about International football we found ourselves in Aberdeen to watch second tier amateurs.
Let me take you to Kaimhill, under the lights(just), on a Friday where Wee Man and I have just seen what is surely game of the season so far and will end the season as top of the pops. 11 goals for free and it almost got abandoned at half time too. For the second time in a week I found myself dipping into the second tier of the local amateurs. This because Wee Man wanted fitba and I was refreshing my offshore survival today so had to keep it local due to time constraints. There was only one game possible……………………and what a fucking game
No doubt the fact we were at a caged in carpet pitch will get me pelters from the aforementioned snobs but this was an epic and was more than just the fitba. The fact there were kids training on the pitch until around two minutes before kick off made me chuckle. But the teams were clearly warmed up enough diving right into battle from the first whistle. A great advert for the Amateur game in the North East for sure. It was end to end from the off. The opening minutes saw a few half chances but it was the hosts in red who struck first. This coming from Grant West who was played in from the left and after a touch he struck back across Jo Garrow into the keepers bottom right. Western soon made it two when Mikey Holland was left in acres of space to coolly slot home a cross from the left first time from ten yards. A blistering start from Western. However, Bridge of Don halved the lead immediately when Cameron Shore rose well to head home from a Brad Jolly corner. This got BOD going and they created decent chances and had a go, flipping the game on its head. Notable chances including Jolly stinging goalkeeper Dylan Gray’s finger tips with a powerful freekick. Striker Masson was then guilty of missing a header from a few yards out after a great ball from Blair Bowie. Inevitably though Bridge of Don equalised. Bowie again creating, (I thought he was very good for the record) when he laid Masson a ball on a silver platter to tap home past Gray. Then a controversial moment when a clear handball occurred in the Western box. I am sure it was handball, Wee Man shouted “dad that’s a pen” but the referee said no. Was this down to the serious lack of light? More on that later. It did not matter as the resulting corner led to Bridge of Don taking the lead. Great Western could not get rid properly, this leading to Bowie putting the ball in the box and Duthie being on hand to finish and put the visitors in the lead in the dying moments of the half. What a game this was turning out to be. However it was in jeopardy as the pre-mentioned diminishing light and no floodlights was not due to saving money. It was due to the lights not working. Surely this entertaining game could fall foul of electrical issues. (Garthdee had had power issues all day).
HT 2 v 3
I heard the referee telling the BOD sideline that he was going to give a full fifteen minutes to allow a chance for the lights to come on. (Amateur is not fifteen usually). In the nick of time a sparkie appeared and got to work. I told Wee Man I was confident as the adjacent Asda had its lights on, the street lights were on, the houses and dry ski slope were illuminated too. It was surely nothing too serious. AC/DC once said, “let there be light……and there was light” and what had been a cracking game so far was to continue when the floodlights popped into life after a twenty one minute half time and big yellow ball kick about.
The entertainment continued and Bridge of Don added a fourth very early in the half after Western couldnt clear their lines. An initial effort was saved, the rebound was half cleared and Masson finished at the third attempt. Breathing space for the visitors but it didnt last for any significant amount of time and Western grabbed a third. This when West notched his second on the rebound from a save off a Holland effort. Game on. From here Bridge of Don attacked from centre and were guilty of missing what to me looked a sitter. They carved Western open leaving Duthie with a chance to strike home unmarked from inside the box. But for some reason he chose to try and place it rather than smash it, this leaving Gray to scramble across the goal and save. A huge chance. One that looked ever more huge when Great Western United went up the park and equalised when West made it a hat trick after latching on to a ball over the top that seemed to catch the Bridge of Don defence out on numerous occasions. The looked to be sleeping here and West made no mistake from around twelve yards. There was still half an hour to go. I couldn’t have been more appreciative to that sparkie who saved the day as this was turning into something brilliant. Then incredibly Western took the lead when BOD keeper Garrow got his bearings wrong and failed to collect a cross leaving Holland with an open net to strike home into. From 2 v 0 up to 4 v 2 down to 5 v 4 up. Incredible goings on. But the men in red were not finished there and a sixth came when that familiar ball over the top found Holland who picked out his teammate Jason Davie in space who made no mistake. Ten goals we had witnessed, This being more than welcome after coming off the back of a turgid 0 v 0 at Hermes a few nights ago. Then if a hat trick for West was not enough he helped himself to a fourth. Another ball over, a good first touch in masses of space and an easy finish to take us for eleven goals for the night. This without a penalty too. Everything ace has to come to an end at some point and referee Mr Geraghty* called time on this epic. One that I must say was played in a great spirit with very little fouls. To add to this both teams tried to play fitba on the deck as much as possible. This aided by the surface. As much as I do not like them they the do bring about passing fitba more often than not. But this could have been played on concrete or blaize tonight and it still would have been first class enjoyment. An ace way to spend a night. One of those, “shame somebody had to lose” affairs
Back to what I was saying at the top. I watch fitba to be entertained. Mission accomplished at Kaimhill and then some.
*Well played to that man for allowing time for the lights. Some refs would have abandoned it. Great refereeing in a rare situation
Entrance – Both Free
Attendance – 30 + a sparkie
Pie – N/A
Pint – N/A
Score Predictions – Me 3 v 1, Wee Man 1 v 2
Season Score Predictions Total – Me 1 v 2 Wee Man