Pleasure Park, Friendly, 17/7/24
Me still 318
Meldrum United Football Club
Founded – 2023
Nickname – N/A
Honours – None
Random Fact – The club are the closest team to my house. To the extent I can hear the referees’s whistle from my back garden
Again on my tod tonight so how about hanging out with my old boy for the “battle of my home towns”. Oldmeldrum being where I have lived for over a decade against Ellon where I grew up (and as stated many a time Thistle being the only other imortant team as well as Aberdeen)
In a way I wish I didn’t bother. Thistle were extremely poor. Just everything smacked of lackluster. After getting home and shaving the grass and strimming my hair I was on foot all of the 0.2 miles to the game, armed with a beer for the road instead of a pint at the nearby Redgarth. Good start to the night. To add to the goodness the pies were on the go on arrival, this a rarity in amateur fitba up here and being supplied by the excellent Presly Butcher in the town was definitely a bonus.
Then the football ruined it. Thistle were a bit shite (they know it too). The amount of unforced errors was incredible . What was apparent early doors was the ref was powered by the earliest shout (both teams). By that I mean whether offside or not or out of play or not, whoever shouted first won, as the ref was always around the centre circle . This ref movement leading to a stonewall penalty being ignored despite an almost full removal of a shirt occurring when the Meldrum man was well beaten as Thistle broke into the box. Not much else happened in the half barring listening to the Meldrum keepers shouts. “BOYS FUCKING COME ON” when in safe possession in midfield knocking it about or “FUCKING NOTHING STUPID MELDRUM” when breaking and winning a corner. But there were more nonsensical yells much to the amusement of many. A source of laughter throughout
HT 0 v 0
Thistle changed things and were soon in the lead when talisman Michael Moffat smashed home a superb effort into the top of the net. This thing was flying. But this was not to set the tone as Thistle were poor. Loose passes, slips, poor marking and more. If Moffat’s goal was a hit then Cheyne for Meldrum wanted to out do him and I swear I will struggle to see a better finish this season. Fucking hell, a cross from the left from Watson found the Meldrum striker who from eighteen yards howitzered a bastard of a volley past Law in the Thistle goal. Awesome stuff. Thistle had as stronger team on in the second half (inclusive of late comer captain Menace who was tardy due to awaiting the arrival of a bearded dragon at his house, I shit you not) but they struggled to take advantage of a wide open Meldrum defence, the balls were there to be played but they were never found and possession was lost far too frequently. Meldrum took advantage and took the lead when Kennedy tested Morris who I think got a touch on to the post but his defence didn’t help their keeper and left as good as a tap in for Birkett. Thistle should have had another penalty when Moffat unleashed a thundering effort which was clearly blocked by a hand but the referee 459 yards away said no. A stone waller if ever you see one. Terrible decision. But in truth the Ellon side didn’t deserve it and the game was gone soon after when Meldrum made it 3 v 1. Taking advantage of a Thomas Blakely slip Clark slipped in Cheyne who pulled a save out of Morris but the rebound fell to Clark and it was game over and deservedly so as Ellon Thistle were very very poor. However the Meldrum keeper shouted “SCREW THE FUCKING HEADS ON MELDRUM FOR FUCK SAKE” in his dog with a 50 a day addiction voice . This after taking a two goal lead in the 90th minute. The game flared up in the last minute with a bit of afters and then a hundred mile an hour booming challenge from Jags man David Coutts which called the end to the game as the ref pretty much blew straight away. It’s a shame that Coutts’ tackle was the first time Thistle seemed to care on the night. Disappointing stuff. But Meldrum deserved it. Thistle were not interested.
But the night was not over, as I was on my own I decided a pint at the Redgarth was good idea and Ill tell you this, it was. Although I have now lived here for a decade I have never had a local. But if I was to choose one in the town it would always be the Redgarth. The boss man of this juicer is Stuart and I doubt there is a better or more friendly bar man out there. Over 30 years in this establishment and he has some stories to tell. One of his recent tales of a certain punk icon was brilliant, but he didn’t publish it anywhere, just tells the story, but he did show me photos and it was excellent to hear about it. A legend, a tour bus, the best country pub in the ‘shire and the soundest barman in the ‘shire. Great stuff
Entrance – Free
Attendance – 77 (rough head count)
Pie – £6, Pie x 2, coffee x 2
Pint – Drank one on the walk down
FITBAWBAG 